Frustrated Teacher

Warning - the contents of this post are primarily a vent of my frustration. (Like you need to be warned about that if you're reading this!)

Whenever I tell people I’ve grown frustrated with teaching, they instantly assume it’s because of the students. And while they can be frustrating at times, that would be like a banker saying he’s frustrated with banking because of the money. It’s not the students that frustrate me enough to consider other professions. In fact, it’s the students who make such a consideration so difficult. But there’s another consideration that makes it difficult for me and that’s the importance of public service or social responsibility.

It’s no secret to anyone who reads this that I lean to the left. I’m not a party member and I’m not even much of a fan of the two-party system, but it has served its purpose and will likely continue to do so, so there’s not much point in fighting about that. My own left leaning stems from my belief that people should be considered a higher priority than property. I believe that government exists to provide a service to its populace, not to its corporations (but note that a solid infrastructure and a peaceful population serve them as well!). Like many who lean to the right, I believe that service only includes some basic functions like law creation and law enforcement and maybe infrastructure creation and maintenance. Fire protection falls in there too. Where my left-leaning pulls me away from those on the right is that I believe a certain amount of re-distribution of wealth is inherent in this process. I don’t mean everyone’s earnings should all go into a big pot and be shared equally, but rather that police and fire protection and infrastructure maintenance should be enjoyed and accessed equally by all. Along those same lines, our government, that of the largest, richest nation in the world, should also see to it that no one in our country suffers for lack of the basic necessities.

It is this last point that generally puts me into that “liberal” category, but the founders of our nation, and of my state in particular must have seen it that way too. Ohio became a state under the Northwest Ordinance. One of the terms of that statehood was that Ohio (and other states who joined the union at the time) must provide public education to all of its citizens. That’s a public service that many these days seem to argue exceeds the category of basic necessity. For the last twenty years, the state of Ohio’s own Supreme Court has declared that Ohio fails to meet that requirement. This leaves public schools to fend for themselves but with no other means of doing so than going to the public in the form of levies for support. The Northwest Ordinance said that OHIO would fund public schools, NOT leave it up to local taxpayers. If there’s a rich public school in Ohio, then there shouldn’t be a poor public school in Ohio. That’s what the conditions of statehood said.

So here’s how this leads to my frustration as a teacher. For the past eight years, I’ve found teaching to be one of the most rewarding, conscience-soothing professions I’ve ever encountered in my working life. Sure teenagers are sometimes a wily, thankless bunch, but as an adult, I have no problem with that. My biggest fear has always been failing to meet their needs from year to year. As a new teacher I felt unprepared and had a horrible time controlling my conscience because I knew I would be shortchanging that first group of students I taught. I finally decided that I was as prepared as anyone, maybe more than some, and we’d just have to get through my first year as best we could. It turned out that my first year wasn’t as bad – I wasn’t as ineffective – as I thought I would be. In fact, by most accounts, I was actually pretty good at it and those students who, by no choice of their own, participated in my “first year experiment” actually learned something and moved on to their next year fairly prepared.

Other than the occasional one-period evaluation from a principal who was no better trained as a teacher, let alone as an evaluator of other teachers, I received NO professional feedback and had to rely on my own sense of how my students were doing in order to continuously improve my skills and the service I provided. I got used to that too, though I apologize to the few adult friends who stuck with me through that time and on whom I unloaded all of the anxiety that the circumstances created.

Eight years later, that anxiety hasn’t left me. I’ve simply learned how to manage it. In the course of those years, I learned that that’s just how it works for teachers. They’re on their own. No one provides them with any meaningful feedback until they screw up. There’s no “corporate training program” to help them continue to develop. Because of that, they have to be some of the most accountable professionals I’ve ever been a part of. So when No Child Left Behind stated as its main goal to hold teachers accountable, I had to laugh. Now that I’ve moved to a new part of the state and am looking for a job, it’s no longer funny. NCLB and funding issues have made it nearly impossible for a proven teacher to move laterally. I learned this summer that the only schools interested in interviewing someone who relocated in order to be nearer his widowed mother are those so desperately in need of funding that the rest of their teachers have jumped ship. In addition, my experience renders me too expensive to work in those districts. The $35-40,000 a year that my proven performance demands is just too rich for the districts with openings. For all they know, they might not even exist as a district next year, so why spend money on an experienced teacher? OK, now I’m just whining about the fact that I didn’t find a job this summer, but it’s relevant!! Indulge me a little.

So here’s where the frustration really comes to a point. I believe in public schools. I believe our state’s founders believed in them too and that’s why they agreed to provide them to Ohio students. As a graduate of, and veteran staffer in public schools, I know first hand that students there get things that most alternatives simply don’t provide. As such, I don’t believe that public funds should ever be diverted from those coffers to be applied to private programs. But as a student advocate – and no teacher can rightfully claim that title without being a student advocate – I believe the needs of the students, this year, right now, must come first. Johnny Doe will never get the chance to re-live his junior year. He deserves the best we can give him right now.

So I’m considering employment with a charter program that actually diverts funding from the struggling local public school system. I hate that, but I also hate the dire need of the students for whom this particular school may be a last chance. Those on the right may be content to build prisons to deal with these students after giving up on them, but I’d rather deal with them before the prison becomes the final option. I don’t want my paycheck to be taking funds out of Ohio’s public schools, but I don’t have many options on the table right now and the needs of these students are no less important than the general population of Ohio’s public school students. I’m learning that moving across the state puts already underpaid and underappreciated veteran teachers back at the bottom of the totem pole, so I’m running out of options quickly. I don’t mind working my way in, but after almost ten years in the classroom, how much proving do I have to do? (OK, I’m whining again)

Then there are the needs of my own family and my own selfish concerns. This other little “distraction” has me considering leaving teaching altogether in favor of a more lucrative profession. I’m considering some options that weigh far less on the social responsibility scale, but that may make it much easier to pay for my own kids’ college. Tough choice, eh? Here again, I’m limited because I feel that profit and social responsibility must be weighed out carefully, but I’m discovering that there are companies out there who believe that social responsibility, community involvement, philanthropy – treating others as you would want to be treated – are as important as their bottom line. Now what do I do?

So there’s the summary. I’ve left a lot of details and smaller issues out because they’d sound like whining. (too late?) When I say I’m frustrated with teaching as a profession, please don’t make the mistake of assuming it has anything to do with students. My frustration is only related to students in the sense that the way the system works right now, it’s getting harder and harder for a reasonable person to stay concerned about the needs of students. Rather than being the reason I would leave teaching, students are the only reason I’d stay. I’m just having more and more trouble remembering that the state and the nation used to be on my side in that concern. I’m convinced they’re as close as they’ve ever been to giving up. Would that mean that Ohio has to relinquish its statehood?

And back to party politics. I’m joining a new party this year: the anti-incumbent party. I’m voting for anyone who didn’t hold the seat in the prior term. Dems, Reps, liberals, conservatives, none of that means anything to me this time around. If you held the seat, and this (look around) is what you’ve done with it, you’re giving it up. Don’t waste your money on your negative ads. You’re not getting my vote!

Later dudes.